What happy couples do differently: the science of staying close after kids

In one lab, couples who shouted at each other stayed married as often as couples who never raised their voice. So the fights are not the whole story. Psychologists have filmed and followed couples for decades, through first babies and years of short nights. Here is what they saw, in a couple with a five-year-old and a baby: the tiny bids for connection, how to answer good news, what lasting couples do inside a fight, the four horsemen, the problems no couple ever solves, and the slow work of sacrifice, saying "we", shared faith and rituals, date nights and thanks.